Don Giovanni: Leporello, where are you?
Leporello: I’m here, worse luck. And you?
Don Giovanni: I’m here.
Leporello: Who’s dead; you, or the old man?
Don Giovanni: What a stupid question! The old man.
Leporello: Bravo! Two impressive feats; to rape the daughter and kill the father.
Don Giovanni: Don’t look at me, he was asking for it.
Leporello: And Donna Anna, was she asking for it too?
Zerlina:
Beat me, dear Masetto,
beat your poor Zerlina.
I'll stand here as meek as a lamb
and bear the blows you lay on me.
You can tear my hair out,
put out my eyes,
yet your dear hands
gladly I'll kiss.
- Mozart, Don Giovanni
Falstaff: Alice! Love calls you.
Alice: Sir John!
Falstaff: Come, I’m firm and fervid. We’re alone…
Alice: No, Meg followed me into the woods.
Falstaff: That doubles the game! She’ll join us!
Carve me up like venison at a banquet;
Tear me to pieces. Cupid is paying me back at last.
- Verdi, Falstaff
Scarpia:
Violent conquest pleases me more
Than soft consent.
I don’t care for sighs or the moonlight.
I can’t strum chords on a guitar,
or tell the future in flower-petals
nor make sheep’s-eyes
or hoot like a turtle-dove.
I desire. – I pursue
what I desire, I satisfy myself then throw her off...
in search of new pleasure.
- Puccini, Tosca
Cold empty bed...springs hurt my head
Feels like ole ned...wished I was dead
What did I do...to be so black and blue
Even the mouse...ran from my house
They laugh at you...and all that you do
What did I do...to be so black and blue
I’m white...inside...but, that don’t help my case
That’s life...can’t hide...what is in my face
How would it end...Ain’t got a friend
My only sin...is in my skin
What did I do...to be so black and blue
- Fats Waller
When that shark bites with his teeth, dear
Scarlet billows start to spread
Fancy gloves, though, wears MacHeath, dear
So there’s not a trace of red.
On the sidewalk Sunday morning
Lies a body oozin' life,
Someone’s sneakin' ‘round the corner
Is that someone Mack the Knife?
- Kurt Wiell, The Threepenny Opera
When your baby won't let you in
Got a few pennies, a bottle of gin
Just call your buddy on the telephone
Let's go get stoned
When you work so hard all the day long
And everything you do seems to go wrong
Just drop by my place on your way home
Let's go get stoned
It ain't no harm
You're takin just a taste
But don't blow your cool
and start messing up the place
It ain't no harm you're faking just a nip
But make sure you don't fall down bust your lip
Let's go get stoned
- Ray Charles, ‘Let’s Go Get Stoned’
Punk rockers encourage suicide, but even they don’t glorify it like Berlioz or Handel, and Leadbelly could certainly teach all these ‘gangstas’ a thing or two about getting away with murder.
So; sex, violence, rape, drugs, race, murder, sadomasochism... what is it, then, that makes modern music the scourge of parents and decent living? Is it because they use bad words? Have poor taste in clothes and jewelry? Actually say the things that used to be hidden behind catchy melodies?
I really don’t know. Someone enlighten me.
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Saturday, April 09, 2005
The Road to Stupid Comics
In 1944, WWII was fully underway. All around the world, governments had organized their economies to work in harmony for the war effort. This lead to such precipitous drops in poverty, crime, and unemployment that many people began to say that a planned economy might not be so terrible a thing to have around even in peacetime. In response, famed German economist and theoretician Friedrich August von Hayek published his magnum opus, The Road to Serfdom, in which he explained why government intervention in the economy - especially of the kind touted by John Maynard Keynes – would inevitably lead to fascism and totalitarian government.
people like Milton Friedman and Margeret Thatcher liked the book, but they found it had far too many ‘words’ and ‘pages’; they wanted something simpler. Finally, a new illustrated edition of The Road to Serfdom was released, explaining the natural progression from high government spending to Nazism. Some highlights:
Well, it was better than Mallard Fillmore.
people like Milton Friedman and Margeret Thatcher liked the book, but they found it had far too many ‘words’ and ‘pages’; they wanted something simpler. Finally, a new illustrated edition of The Road to Serfdom was released, explaining the natural progression from high government spending to Nazism. Some highlights:
Well, it was better than Mallard Fillmore.
Thursday, April 07, 2005
Mr. Achates' Ten Point-Plan For A Better America
In brief:
I. Find a source of clean energy.
Our dependence on oil and coal has ruined our foreign policy and is destroying the earth beyond the point of repair. Wind and solar power look promising, but adequate funding should be provided for all promising leads.
II. Re-industrialization.
America is almost on the verge of becoming a non-industrialized country. I say, away with the crappy service-sector economy, we need to be able to produce, not for profit, but for use and for need.
III. Free health care, education, public transit, and communication.
This goes without saying. Without these, no one can be a full citizen in modern society.
IV. Electoral reform
Namely, the abolition of the electoral college and the introduction of a proportional representation system.
V. Re-organization of industries into cooperatives
Clearly, our business executives are too incompetent, stupid and corrupt to run a business by themselves. Factories, workshops, farms etc. should be controlled by those who actually work them. This would also break up the agribusiness monopolies and improve the quality of American foodstuffs.
VI. Re-establishment and increase of the inheritance tax
American society is becoming rapidly stratified, and upward mobility is at its lowest level in decades. The emerging aristocracy must be destroyed before it can assume total control. And believe me, rich kids need a good kick in the teeth.
VII. Strong enforcement of the progressive tax system
Even under the current system, the IRS is owed about $300 billion more than it takes in every single year. If the wealthy would simply pay the taxes they owe, imagine what could be done with $300 dollars.
VIII. Legalization of marijuana
Pot is far less dangerous to health than tobacco and alcohol, and if those are legal, cannabis should be too. Making it legal would also reduce the prison populations by almost 40% in a single day.
IX. Subsidized arts
Increased funding for museums, theater, concerts, opera, etc. No one should ever be so poor that a night watching ‘La Boheme’ is beyond their reach.
X. Changing the national anthem
Make it something singable, dammit. Maybe ‘The House I live In’ or ‘Simple Gifts’
I. Find a source of clean energy.
Our dependence on oil and coal has ruined our foreign policy and is destroying the earth beyond the point of repair. Wind and solar power look promising, but adequate funding should be provided for all promising leads.
II. Re-industrialization.
America is almost on the verge of becoming a non-industrialized country. I say, away with the crappy service-sector economy, we need to be able to produce, not for profit, but for use and for need.
III. Free health care, education, public transit, and communication.
This goes without saying. Without these, no one can be a full citizen in modern society.
IV. Electoral reform
Namely, the abolition of the electoral college and the introduction of a proportional representation system.
V. Re-organization of industries into cooperatives
Clearly, our business executives are too incompetent, stupid and corrupt to run a business by themselves. Factories, workshops, farms etc. should be controlled by those who actually work them. This would also break up the agribusiness monopolies and improve the quality of American foodstuffs.
VI. Re-establishment and increase of the inheritance tax
American society is becoming rapidly stratified, and upward mobility is at its lowest level in decades. The emerging aristocracy must be destroyed before it can assume total control. And believe me, rich kids need a good kick in the teeth.
VII. Strong enforcement of the progressive tax system
Even under the current system, the IRS is owed about $300 billion more than it takes in every single year. If the wealthy would simply pay the taxes they owe, imagine what could be done with $300 dollars.
VIII. Legalization of marijuana
Pot is far less dangerous to health than tobacco and alcohol, and if those are legal, cannabis should be too. Making it legal would also reduce the prison populations by almost 40% in a single day.
IX. Subsidized arts
Increased funding for museums, theater, concerts, opera, etc. No one should ever be so poor that a night watching ‘La Boheme’ is beyond their reach.
X. Changing the national anthem
Make it something singable, dammit. Maybe ‘The House I live In’ or ‘Simple Gifts’
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
Prima La Musica E Poi Le Parole
I notice my posts have been entirely political in nature, and since I need something to distract me from the noiseless demise of American democracy, I’ll divide my time between politics and something modern society has rendered meaningless: culture.
And I thought: What’s more important in song; words or music? Obviously, the only way to answer that question was via a scene/dialogue between two people who are technically dead:
Guiseppe Verdi - Composer
Arrigo Boito – Writer
(Boito is sitting at his desk, holding a copy of Othello. He is reading aloud intently as he copies down the words onto a piece of paper.)
Boito: “Soft you; a word or two before you go. I have done the state some service, and they know't. No more of that. I pray you, in your letters, when you shall these unlucky deeds relate, speak of me as I am; nothing – (someone in the next room starts playing the piano) nothing extenuate, nor set down aught in malice: then must you speak Of one that loved not wisely but – (The piano music gets increasingly louder, causing Boito to pause) but too well; ff one not easily jealous, but being wrought, Perplex'd in the extreme; (shouting to make himself heard) of one whose hand, like the base Indian, threw a pearl away richer than” –(By now, it is so loud he cannot hear himself) Oh, come on! (Boito gets up and walks over into the next room, where Verdi is banging away at the piano.) Will you stop that?!?!
Verdi: (Also yelling) Stop what?
Boito: The piano!
Verdi: (stopping) Absolutely not. (He resumes)
Boito: Please! I’m trying to write.
Verdi: Well then, I definitely won’t bother stopping. Arrigo, I hope I’m not hurting your feelings, but whatever mangled verses you manage to wrench out of Shakespeare are hardly crucial to making this opera a good one. If we succeed, you can thank my piano, and not your pen.
Boito: Pardon me? Are you suggesting that how words are sung is more important than what they are?
Verdi: I’m hardly ‘suggesting it. I’ve taken it as a rule of musical composition that a good scale will beat a good dictionary.
Boito: Well, that is a bunch of nonsense. It is the words that are most important in conveying the full meaning of any song, chorus, or opera. Music may enhance it, but without a means of clarification, people are lost.
Verdi: ’People are lost’? I can’t imagine what you’re talking about. Words exist to convey meaning. We feel and we think and we react, and we attempt to communicate what happens in our minds. At our lowest level we grunt and gesture. Above that there’s verbal language, and beyond that, music. If you are merely going to say something, you’d be surprised by how little you are understood. Music, by contrast, is not the abstract expression of human emotion, but the emotions themselves. Words like ‘love’, ‘joy’, and ‘fear’ mean very different things to different people. Yet we can tell, by a rustling in the strings, a murmuring of the horns, or a slight inflection in the soprano’s A-flat whether someone is happy, sad, or indifferent. One can lie with words, certainly. With music, never.
Boito: Really! And do you really believe that no one listening to a song cares about what is being said? The emotions you talk about may be universal, but the actual text of a song is not. To some, this may reduce the experience, I admit, but to others it will add the greatest poignancy and depth. I might not care overmuch when a father sings about losing his daughter, but the man sitting next to me may be moved to tears, because he knows what it is like.
Verdi: I never said prose and poetry didn’t matter, only that they matter rather less than melody, harmony, and rhythm. Look at the level of literary skill present in most song-writing. It is appalling. Take this example:
We are ships on the silver waves
Cast adrift
Each pleasure is a rock
The whole of life, a sea.*
Do you recognize that bit of doggerel?
Boito: No, I don’t.
Verdi: Well, it doesn’t matter. The point is that poor Vivaldi was obliged to obscure it behind the most elaborate ornamentation and vocal pyrotechnics. Do you understand? He had to hide the words to make it a decent song.
Boito: I call foul on that. You have chosen an extreme example of overwrought, florid writing. Of course I’m not going to be able to defend every syllable ever set to music.
Verdi: You may be right. Very well, let’s look at something more straightforward:
Che faro senza Euridice?
Dove andro senza il mio ben?**
Repeat unto infinite. On the page, it looks terrible. Yet, thanks to Gluck’s skill, Orpheus’s sorrow and heartbreak are perfectly plain.
Boito: Well, if you’re going to be a snob, and focus on nothing but classical music…
Verdi: I am not a snob. Did you think I was leaving out jazz and other popular entertainments? Not at all. The only differences are in instrumentation and scales. Even in those genres, a strong beat or memorable tune takes precedence over any lyrics. Here, I’ll give you an example:
Oh the shark has pretty teeth dear
And he shows them pearly white
Just a jackknife has Macheath dear
And he keeps it out of sight
On the sidewalk Sunday mornin'
Lies a body oozing life
Someone sneakin' round the corner
Is that someone Mack the Knife?***
If I had merely spoken those lines, what meaning would they have?
Boito: They would have as much meaning as I chose to give them. I think this is even more true in regards to words than to music. An A is always an A, but as you said, yet ‘love’, ‘joy’, and ‘anger’ are different to all who hear them. I tried composing for years, and was never very successful. It was only when I focused entirely on literary style was my true voice heard.
Verdi: Well, I think my composing music to your libretti had something to do with it. I should say that in every writer there is a failed – or, more hopefully, an aspiring – composer. If you need more proof, consider this: a song with the same lyrics but different music could hardly be considered the same song; a song that has a different text but remains otherwise unchanged is merely an alternate version. Words are slurred, omitted, mispronounced, and otherwise rendered unintelligible. The effect is nominal, if there is one at all.
Boito: You can talk forever about how much we can tell from music, but if what you’re saying is true, there could be no such thing as the political song or the national anthem. You must admit that the music for these things is often rather lacking. I believe the poetry of ‘Jerusalem'^, for example, is far superior to the music. Do you think it doesn’t matter to people whether they are singing the words to ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’, ‘The Internationale’ or ’Deutschland Uber Alles’?
Verdi: As for political songs and anthems, I think you’ve chosen some unfortunate examples. None of the songs you mentioned are now sung to the lyrics for which the melodies were written^^. As for national anthems - well, I admit, there are exceptions, as always. But political songs are hardly the norm. I should say that at least nine songs out of ten deal overwhelmingly not with social justice and activism, but with pure human pathos.
Boito: Do you think so?
Verdi: I do.
Boito: Well, it’s one of those things that are impossible to measure, isn’t it?
Verdi: Undoubtedly so. One other thing to consider: Music is more natural. People who sing to themselves are pleasant, people who talk to themselves are insane.
Boito: Unless they talk sense to themselves, which is better than singing nonsense to others.
Verdi: We’re getting off-topic. That’s enough for now, I have work to do.
Boito: As do I. I’m going to find a nice quiet place for me and Shakespeare.
(Boito exits humming softly to himself, Verdi mutters under his breath as he watches the librettist amble away.)
*Siam navi all’onde algente’ from L’Olimpiade. Music by Antonio Vivaldi. Lyrics by Pietro Metastasio.
**Che faro senza Euridice?’ from Orfeo ed Euridice. Music by Christoph Gluck. Lyrics by Ranieri da Calzabigi. Literally, it translates to this:
What will I do without Eurydice?
Where will I go without my love?
***Mack the Knife’. Music by Kurt Weill. Lyrics by Bertol Brecht.
^Jerusalem’, a poem by William Blake, was set to music by Hubert Parry and became a sort of secondary anthem of the British Labour Party.
^^Originally ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’ was a Scottish drinking song knows as ‘To Anacreon in Heaven’ while ‘The Internationale’ was sung only in French, and Deutschland Uber Alles was the wordless second movement of a Haydn string quartet.
And I thought: What’s more important in song; words or music? Obviously, the only way to answer that question was via a scene/dialogue between two people who are technically dead:
Guiseppe Verdi - Composer
Arrigo Boito – Writer
(Boito is sitting at his desk, holding a copy of Othello. He is reading aloud intently as he copies down the words onto a piece of paper.)
Boito: “Soft you; a word or two before you go. I have done the state some service, and they know't. No more of that. I pray you, in your letters, when you shall these unlucky deeds relate, speak of me as I am; nothing – (someone in the next room starts playing the piano) nothing extenuate, nor set down aught in malice: then must you speak Of one that loved not wisely but – (The piano music gets increasingly louder, causing Boito to pause) but too well; ff one not easily jealous, but being wrought, Perplex'd in the extreme; (shouting to make himself heard) of one whose hand, like the base Indian, threw a pearl away richer than” –(By now, it is so loud he cannot hear himself) Oh, come on! (Boito gets up and walks over into the next room, where Verdi is banging away at the piano.) Will you stop that?!?!
Verdi: (Also yelling) Stop what?
Boito: The piano!
Verdi: (stopping) Absolutely not. (He resumes)
Boito: Please! I’m trying to write.
Verdi: Well then, I definitely won’t bother stopping. Arrigo, I hope I’m not hurting your feelings, but whatever mangled verses you manage to wrench out of Shakespeare are hardly crucial to making this opera a good one. If we succeed, you can thank my piano, and not your pen.
Boito: Pardon me? Are you suggesting that how words are sung is more important than what they are?
Verdi: I’m hardly ‘suggesting it. I’ve taken it as a rule of musical composition that a good scale will beat a good dictionary.
Boito: Well, that is a bunch of nonsense. It is the words that are most important in conveying the full meaning of any song, chorus, or opera. Music may enhance it, but without a means of clarification, people are lost.
Verdi: ’People are lost’? I can’t imagine what you’re talking about. Words exist to convey meaning. We feel and we think and we react, and we attempt to communicate what happens in our minds. At our lowest level we grunt and gesture. Above that there’s verbal language, and beyond that, music. If you are merely going to say something, you’d be surprised by how little you are understood. Music, by contrast, is not the abstract expression of human emotion, but the emotions themselves. Words like ‘love’, ‘joy’, and ‘fear’ mean very different things to different people. Yet we can tell, by a rustling in the strings, a murmuring of the horns, or a slight inflection in the soprano’s A-flat whether someone is happy, sad, or indifferent. One can lie with words, certainly. With music, never.
Boito: Really! And do you really believe that no one listening to a song cares about what is being said? The emotions you talk about may be universal, but the actual text of a song is not. To some, this may reduce the experience, I admit, but to others it will add the greatest poignancy and depth. I might not care overmuch when a father sings about losing his daughter, but the man sitting next to me may be moved to tears, because he knows what it is like.
Verdi: I never said prose and poetry didn’t matter, only that they matter rather less than melody, harmony, and rhythm. Look at the level of literary skill present in most song-writing. It is appalling. Take this example:
We are ships on the silver waves
Cast adrift
Each pleasure is a rock
The whole of life, a sea.*
Do you recognize that bit of doggerel?
Boito: No, I don’t.
Verdi: Well, it doesn’t matter. The point is that poor Vivaldi was obliged to obscure it behind the most elaborate ornamentation and vocal pyrotechnics. Do you understand? He had to hide the words to make it a decent song.
Boito: I call foul on that. You have chosen an extreme example of overwrought, florid writing. Of course I’m not going to be able to defend every syllable ever set to music.
Verdi: You may be right. Very well, let’s look at something more straightforward:
Che faro senza Euridice?
Dove andro senza il mio ben?**
Repeat unto infinite. On the page, it looks terrible. Yet, thanks to Gluck’s skill, Orpheus’s sorrow and heartbreak are perfectly plain.
Boito: Well, if you’re going to be a snob, and focus on nothing but classical music…
Verdi: I am not a snob. Did you think I was leaving out jazz and other popular entertainments? Not at all. The only differences are in instrumentation and scales. Even in those genres, a strong beat or memorable tune takes precedence over any lyrics. Here, I’ll give you an example:
Oh the shark has pretty teeth dear
And he shows them pearly white
Just a jackknife has Macheath dear
And he keeps it out of sight
On the sidewalk Sunday mornin'
Lies a body oozing life
Someone sneakin' round the corner
Is that someone Mack the Knife?***
If I had merely spoken those lines, what meaning would they have?
Boito: They would have as much meaning as I chose to give them. I think this is even more true in regards to words than to music. An A is always an A, but as you said, yet ‘love’, ‘joy’, and ‘anger’ are different to all who hear them. I tried composing for years, and was never very successful. It was only when I focused entirely on literary style was my true voice heard.
Verdi: Well, I think my composing music to your libretti had something to do with it. I should say that in every writer there is a failed – or, more hopefully, an aspiring – composer. If you need more proof, consider this: a song with the same lyrics but different music could hardly be considered the same song; a song that has a different text but remains otherwise unchanged is merely an alternate version. Words are slurred, omitted, mispronounced, and otherwise rendered unintelligible. The effect is nominal, if there is one at all.
Boito: You can talk forever about how much we can tell from music, but if what you’re saying is true, there could be no such thing as the political song or the national anthem. You must admit that the music for these things is often rather lacking. I believe the poetry of ‘Jerusalem'^, for example, is far superior to the music. Do you think it doesn’t matter to people whether they are singing the words to ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’, ‘The Internationale’ or ’Deutschland Uber Alles’?
Verdi: As for political songs and anthems, I think you’ve chosen some unfortunate examples. None of the songs you mentioned are now sung to the lyrics for which the melodies were written^^. As for national anthems - well, I admit, there are exceptions, as always. But political songs are hardly the norm. I should say that at least nine songs out of ten deal overwhelmingly not with social justice and activism, but with pure human pathos.
Boito: Do you think so?
Verdi: I do.
Boito: Well, it’s one of those things that are impossible to measure, isn’t it?
Verdi: Undoubtedly so. One other thing to consider: Music is more natural. People who sing to themselves are pleasant, people who talk to themselves are insane.
Boito: Unless they talk sense to themselves, which is better than singing nonsense to others.
Verdi: We’re getting off-topic. That’s enough for now, I have work to do.
Boito: As do I. I’m going to find a nice quiet place for me and Shakespeare.
(Boito exits humming softly to himself, Verdi mutters under his breath as he watches the librettist amble away.)
*Siam navi all’onde algente’ from L’Olimpiade. Music by Antonio Vivaldi. Lyrics by Pietro Metastasio.
**Che faro senza Euridice?’ from Orfeo ed Euridice. Music by Christoph Gluck. Lyrics by Ranieri da Calzabigi. Literally, it translates to this:
What will I do without Eurydice?
Where will I go without my love?
***Mack the Knife’. Music by Kurt Weill. Lyrics by Bertol Brecht.
^Jerusalem’, a poem by William Blake, was set to music by Hubert Parry and became a sort of secondary anthem of the British Labour Party.
^^Originally ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’ was a Scottish drinking song knows as ‘To Anacreon in Heaven’ while ‘The Internationale’ was sung only in French, and Deutschland Uber Alles was the wordless second movement of a Haydn string quartet.
Monday, April 04, 2005
Democracy Crucified
About a month ago, Alabama senator Richard Shelby filed the Constitution Restoration Act (CRA) apparently in the interest of ‘increasing federalism’. So what does this vaguely titled bill do, and why do I care? Essentially, it bans any federal court or judge from ever again reviewing:
Goodbye, American Republic. Goodbye, Bill of Rights. We’ll miss you. I am completely serious about this, by the way. This bill is death to all our naive secular notions of freedom and the law.
And chances are looking pretty good that this monstrosity to pass. The CRA already has 28 sponsors in the House and Senate, and Sen. Shelby’s office claims ‘we have the votes’. And why not? The Religious Right owns the Republican Party lock, stock, and barrel. 45 senators and 186 representatives get 80-100 ratings from the Christian Coalition. There’s no democracy in the Bible; so far as they’re concerned this whole sham of ‘elections’ has just been a prelude to the re-establishment of Christendom.
When I’m getting dragged off to the Re-education Camp for Socialist Heathens, I’ll know who to blame.
Any matter to the extent that relief is sought against an entity of Federal, State, or local government, or against an officer or agent of Federal, State, or local government (whether or not acting in official or personal capacity), concerning that entity's, officer's, or agent's acknowledgment of God as the sovereign source of law, liberty, or government. (Emphasis added. Full text here)So what does that mean? It means (deep breath) that someone’s interpretation of the Bible will trump the US constitution and federal law. Always wanted to burn witches? Kill homosexuals? Sell your children into slavery? Well, thanks to this bill, you can, and the US justice system can’t do anything about it. They’d be dismissed for even considering it! In fact, you can break any law you care to, so long as you can find a justification for it in Leviticus.
Goodbye, American Republic. Goodbye, Bill of Rights. We’ll miss you. I am completely serious about this, by the way. This bill is death to all our naive secular notions of freedom and the law.
And chances are looking pretty good that this monstrosity to pass. The CRA already has 28 sponsors in the House and Senate, and Sen. Shelby’s office claims ‘we have the votes’. And why not? The Religious Right owns the Republican Party lock, stock, and barrel. 45 senators and 186 representatives get 80-100 ratings from the Christian Coalition. There’s no democracy in the Bible; so far as they’re concerned this whole sham of ‘elections’ has just been a prelude to the re-establishment of Christendom.
When I’m getting dragged off to the Re-education Camp for Socialist Heathens, I’ll know who to blame.
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